themblan's blog

First up: Medal of Honor (PC) The single-player game and the multiplayer game are powered by two completely different engines and developed by two completely different teams. This probably saved them a lot of time, but the evenness definitely suffered. For example, the multiplayer maps may resemble the theme of the single-player game (Afghanistan), but they are not from the game at all. The guns don't carry over, either. Single-Player Powered by Unreal Engine 3, this is the uglier of the two modes. The textures are not very good, and the AA doesn't really work too well; everything is still jaggy. The actual campaign, though, is excellent. It felt less like a Michael Bay movie, and more like a modern war movie, like Hurt Locker, the superior Green Zone, and even Brothers. This is the most emotionally captivating FPS I have ever played. The length, however, is pretty short. You can finish this game in 5 hours. Also, the FOV is non-changeable, unlike in multiplayer. I got u...

So the demo is out. Is it any good? No. It feels and looks like the same game as 2K10. The magnetic player interaction and linked animations are back. They did not fix it, like they said they would. And, you can only play as the Lakers. What is that? Andrew Bynum and Ray Allen look incredibly ugly and nothing like their RL counterparts. I am very disappointed in the demo. If it's indicative of the final game, I will not get 2K11; I was going to buy it, too, because of Michael Jordan

Abandoned is an okay movie. The story is okay, but Brittany Murphy is very ugly. Her fake lips are okay when she's talking or smiling, but when she has a blank stare, you can really tell her lips are fake and slightly uneven. I was very offended and repulsed by her fake lips. It turned an intriguing movie into an almost unwatchable one. All I can think about are her fake lips. Attention, Wal-Mart shoppers: do not ever get fake lips. Thank you.

So I got all 30 Crystal Skulls in Ninja Gaiden 2 and all I got was gamerpoints and this gamerpic: FML

I just beat Ninja Gaiden 2 for Xbox 360. It's a fantastic video game - the best action game of the generation. Buy it now at newegg.com .

1. Cancel - Everything is a cancel. Cancel, cancel, cancel. Every game has a cancel of some kind. It may be the best term for it, but it's overused and I'm sick of reading it.

Yeah, I was very disappointed in this game. It took me 26 minutes to beat it, most of it on the final form of the boss. I didn't know you were supposed to use ARS to beat it, so I would go in and out of cover and fire for a few seconds, only to wait much longer under cover until it stopped firing at me. It was so tedious, and the NPCs were absolutely worthless, save for one who gave me ammo. The graphics look sick in trailers, but it didn't look sick IRL. The voice acting was so bad, especially Sam Gideon's. I don't like him as a character either: a white, former jock quarterback who smokes cigarettes? Um, no thanks. That totally doesn't appeal to me. If this game had multiplayer, it'd be much better, but of course it doesn't. I can't see this game offering anything more than a $20 bargain bin experience of playing it once and forgetting about it. It doesn't have the inventory system of a Resident Evil 4 or 5. It seems to have a weapon upgrade system...

Capitalism is high school. It's all it is. It's competition. It's doing things you don't want to do so that other people will like you. Even the nerdy, unpopular ones, especially the overachieving people - they're doing things so that other people will like them. These people are the admissions people at colleges. "Look at me! I do extracurricular activities! Pick me to be in your college!" Screw that. I never kissed ass or performed fellatio for anything in my life. I will never beg for anything. Money is garbage. Having an economic system based on money is incredibly dumb, especially for America, which has so much natural resources. We are wasting our time competing over one another while those with the money are prostitutes and vacationing on tropical islands. We need to abolish money and go back to a barter economy and grow our own food.

Bioshock? More like Biosh..! I decided to give this game a second chance and it was okay, but I just don't like it. First of all, you have to explore the environment to pick up important things like plasmids, tonics, ammo, health and money, to things like potato chips, alcoholic drinks and cigarettes (I know that these drugs restore health and EVE as well). I wouldn't mind if you just had to press the "A" button or whatever, but you have to look at the thing, and then press the "A" button. It's annoying. You spend half the time looking down at the ground instead of the levels. It's just tedious. I hate looting things in a video game, especially a console game. Borderlands, not only being an ugly game, had a tedious loot system that had you pressing the loot button 50 million times and making decisions. "Hmm, is this piece of loot better than that piece of loot?" In PC games, it's better because you can use a mouse, but with console ga...

Wow, what a boring snorefest. Robert Downey's accent was horrible.

Wewt. I got my first S ranking in Resident Evil 5's Mercenaries mode. I used Battle Suit Jill in Ship Deck and got around 69K. I loved killing the 2 Chainsaw Maijinis (1 blue, 1 red) with one rocket. It was awesome. I found a location where the baddies can't follow me. Of course this means they won't congregate in an area either and it's harder for me to get kills, but I did get some kills from the invulnerable spot.

I don't know why no one can see this. The artwork for the game and the actual, in-game model look nothing alike.

Life sucks. "Oo, look at me. I suck figurative genitalia. Give me money!" Capitalism is basically pimping and whoring. Those with money are the pimps and the employees are whores. They'll do almost anything for money. It is as simple as that. I, however, have standards. I'm not gonna buff up my resume to beg for money. I don't give a damn, you feeble-minded masses! Sheep, the lot of you! I am a wolf. Hear me howl! AWOOOOOOOOOOO!

Uncertain of his Sister’s Fate, a Boy enters LIMBO This is a fantastic game. Why? 1. It is atmospheric. It is creepy, spooky, scary, whatever you want to call it; it is also mysterious. 2. The controls are basic, but the gameplay is complex. There are two buttons in the game: one for jumping and one for all the context-sensitive actions. It's all it really needs. The controls are sometimes not as precise as I would like them and they have weird nuances, like if you hold down the jump button, you will eternally make little hops. It is hard to make consecutive jumps without stopping. For example, to make two jumps in a row with little to no stop in-between, you have to jump, stop, and then jump again. If you press the jump button immediately after you land, you will do this awkward, short jump and fall to your death. 3. The puzzles are usually intuitive, except for the later ones, which get more and more complex to the point of absurdity. They do not exist in the natural worl...

Yep. Ninja Gaiden (2004), for the Xbox, is overrated. Ninja Gaiden 2 (2008) is better this game. Ninja Gaiden tried too much to be an epic, action-adventure game, and it ended up diluting the action of the game. There is too much wandering around, trying to figure out what to do. I hate games like this, unless it's a puzzle presented directly to you and you possess all the tools you need to solve it, like Limbo. Limbo pwnz0rz. Anyway, Ninja Gaiden 2 shits all over this game because Team Ninja realized that the parts where they were trying to emulate Zelda were bad, but the action kicked ass, so they nuked the shitty adventure parts and buffed the awesome action parts. Good job, Team Ninja. So what, you ask? Ninja Gaiden 2 should be better than Ninja Gaiden because it's the fucking sequel, right? Wrong. Ninja Gaiden 2 was universally lambasted by so-called video game critics, while Ninja Gaiden was put on a pedestal as the second coming. They're so dumb. Mainstream video ...

Life is bad, especially this American culture and economic system we live in. I saw a video about rape on Native American reservations and I realize that the entire American system - the whole Western civilization promotes crime and self-destruction. It is pretty remarkable. Before the crackers came to what is now North and South America, there was very little crime and much less disease. Now, you bring STDs, alcohol and capitalism over and now you're fucking everything up. Sure, Natives still engaged in tribal warfare, but their way of life, overall, was self-sustaining. They lived off the land, and not each other. Capitalism is not good, because it forces people to live off of each other, and to take advantage of each other. The Native lifestyle, which I will generalize, is so much better, because you're not living off of people; rather, you're living off the earth, which, if you believe in God, was the way He meant for us to live. Capitalism breeds greed. Part of tha...

Sup people! So I tried Alan Wake for the first time tonight, having borrowed it from the library. It's pretty bad. The game starts off with a quote from Stephen King, saying how nightmares don't make sense, and that's why they're good - how the mystery makes it good. I groaned in my mind, thinking of the philosophy behind the television show "Lost," - how they just pour questions and more questions into the show and answer questions with more questions. It is very unsatisfying. So Alan Wake's graphics are certainly not top-tier, but at least it doesn't look like Deadly Premonitions. The setting is nice: an out-of-the way place dominated by nature - a perfect place for a getaway for a writer such as Alan Wake. I really prefer natural environments and levels in video games, so this is a good thing. Unfortunately, the levels are like those in most modern video games, meaning they are extremely linear, shepherding you, the player, from one point to the n...

Why? Because of the horrible controls. First of all, going upside down around tiny little planetoids does not help this control. Secondly, triple-jumping is an exercise in lag anticipation (because of the Wiimote's innate wirelessness). Thirdly, directionally influencing a jump laterally after a jump has been executed is extremely limited. Basically, you can only jump forwards and backwards. This is really dumb and cripples the controls the most. I don't know why people like this game. The controls are not good.

Yeah, I saw this coming a mile away. People were like, "ZOMG Shaq! ZOMG Antawn Jamison!" First of all, Shaq is old, and is not a major factor. If he was like David Robinson, he'd at least be a defensive presence. OK. Shaq is a defensive presence because when people drive the lane, they do not want to hit him or they'll go flying. Antawn Jamison was a bum on the Wizards and he's a bum on the Cavs. Last night, he made so many mistakes in the few minutes I saw him play. Imagine how many mistakes I would have seen if I had seen the whole game. Celtics vs. Magic - Eastern Conference Finals.

First of all, the title is dumb. What does it mean? There is no locker in the movie, and there is no one by the name "Hurt" or "Locker". Green Zone was ten times better than "Hurt Locker". "Hurt Locker" needs to jump off a cliff and DIAF. Thank you, and have a good day.

Stop pissing standing up. Sit down and piss. Even if you get all your piss into the toilet, there is something called splashing that occurs. Standing-up-peeing made sense before toilets, but there is no excuse now. Siddown! Going to male apartments and homes is pretty sick. Their toilets are so dirty. How can you take a shit with the toilet seat on? I can't. I gotta take a shit with the seat up. That's why I keep my toilet clean by sitting on it to pee and also clean it before I sit on it, but after some other dirty male has pissed into it standing up. Also, my dad is a slob, because he takes a piss with the bathroom door open. What is that? I don't want to hear your piss splashing into the toilet water! That's disgusting. Close the damn door!

I'm getting a very strong first impression of FFXIII. It effectively pays tribute to some of the best FFs in the series, including FFVII, FFVIII, and FFX. It is also laugh-out-loud funny at times, regarding the chocobo riding in Sazh's hair and Vanille's character, who reminded me a lot of a younger, cuter, more naive version of Phoebe from Friends. UPDATE: This game is not good and I traded it in to Gamestop toward an Xbox 360 250 GB AKA Xbox 360 "Slim."

Green Zone is a fantastic movie. The people that are writing that this game is anti-American are out of their minds. Green Zone is a highly pro-American movie, if the America we stand for and believe in is about truth and justice. If the America we stand for is about money, greed, power, corruption, rapacity, violence, and retardation, then yes, Green Zone is an amazingly anti-American film.