Attention: Males

Stop pissing standing up. Sit down and piss. Even if you get all your piss into the toilet, there is something called splashing that occurs. Standing-up-peeing made sense before toilets, but there is no excuse now. Siddown!

Going to male apartments and homes is pretty sick. Their toilets are so dirty. How can you take a shit with the toilet seat on? I can't. I gotta take a shit with the seat up. That's why I keep my toilet clean by sitting on it to pee and also clean it before I sit on it, but after some other dirty male has pissed into it standing up.

Also, my dad is a slob, because he takes a piss with the bathroom door open. What is that? I don't want to hear your piss splashing into the toilet water! That's disgusting. Close the damn door!

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